


Backfire! (ZADF)

by novawrite



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Action/Adventure, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Dib & Zim Friendship (Invader Zim), Dib Being an Asshole (Invader Zim), Dib Being an Idiot (Invader Zim), Dib Has Issues (Invader Zim), Frenemies Dib & Zim (Invader Zim), Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Irken Dib (Invader Zim), Kinda?, Older Dib (Invader Zim), Self-Hatred, anD WHAT OF IT, author knows nothing about tech, gaz has the braincell, just a huge fucking dummy, listen if I wanna cope with the election by writing invader zim fanfic I fucking will, well mostly hurt at this point, yeah I wrote an iz fic, zoom class can wait
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:53:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27370756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novawrite/pseuds/novawrite
Summary: What are you supposed to do when the one thing you're fighting against is what you really are? Go on a chaotic space journey to find out your true heritage? Probably not, but that's what happens in this fic anyways.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 34
Collections: Invader Zim





	1. Fake-out

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: This chapter is angsty
> 
> (For context, this would take place when Dib and Zim are around 15-16, post ETF.)
> 
> This isn't a ZADR fic, but I don't really mind if you interpret it like that I guess. I don't care if you ship or don't, please just leave me out of the drama.

_Maybe it was a bad idea to only wear my coat today._

Dib shivered in the fall air as he made the daily trek to Zim's 'house'. Perhaps tomorrow he would wear an actual sweater, under the coat of course. The coat was necessary, it made him look mysterious. Lost in his thoughts, Dib barely noticed that the entire neighborhood seemed deserted. By the time he reached Zim's block, the teenaged conspiracy-theorist had realized that oddly, all the doors were wide open, and the lights in all of the houses were off. Whatever, he still had a planet to save.

As he opened the alien's gate and dodged the hostile garden gnomes, something felt... off. Everything was still, but somehow the 'house' seemed alive in a way. Dib stood still for a moment, and realized he could hear some sort of humming coming from below him. That wasn't normal, but was anything normal with an alien invader? Dib continued on and swung open the bathroom stall door.

"Zim! I'm here to ruin your evil plans again!"

Silence. Was he even home? Dib paused for a second, before calling out again.

"GIR! Are you there!?"

If GIR wasn't home, something was really wrong. Dib was about to venture deeper into the alien lair, when he heard a loud ' _CLUNK'_ from the 'kitchen'. Metal footsteps followed, and the little robot walked out into the living room. Dib watched this happen, expecting the machine to yell "INTRUDER!" or something along those lines. Instead, GIR looked up, and jumped. "OH, MASTER! I THOUGHT YOU WERE IN THE CONTROL ROOM!" The human looked confused. "Master? I think you have the wrong person." Dib muttered as he kneeled down to GIR's level. "Would your _actual_ master happen to be around?"

GIR stood still for a moment, almost frozen before responding. "OH! HE'S RIGHT OVER HERE!" The broken SIR unit grabbed Dib's arm and tugged him towards the kitchen. The teen followed, bending over awkwardly so he didn't accidentally lift the robot off the ground. The odd pair entered the next room, a decoy kitchen covered in graffiti-like scribbles along the walls. GIR skipped across the room, over to the trash can and jumped in with a _THUD._ Dib startled. _What the hell is Zim's evil robot doing?_

Suddenly, there was a _click!_ and the trash can opened from the floor, into a seemingly bottomless chute. A small platform slid out, and GIR hopped onto it. Tentatively, Dib stepped on as well, feeling like an idiot for jumping into a trashcan. With a jolt the platform started moving downward, making Dib more than a little dizzy. Layers of soil and rock passed by them, tinted pink by the claustrophobic tube. By the time they reached the bottom, Dib was disoriented and nauseous.

_How often does Zim do this?_

The metal platform dropped down to the floor of some sort of...'evil lair' was really the only way to describe it. The room was circular, and unreasonably huge. There was a cluster of computer screens and radars connected to the ceiling by cords and wires, although the screens were all blank. Ominous looking test tubes filled with purple fluid lined the walls, and the whole place reeked of creepy.

GIR seemed in no way deterred by this, and running up to the controls and pressing anything and everything within reach. After a couple seconds, the screens flickered on and a booming voice sounded throughout the base.

**"What do you want, GIR."**

"WHERE'S MASTER?"

The voice sighed. 

**"He's in the lab."**

GIR grinned mechanically, and hit another button, with a purpose this time. An almost concealed door to the left slid open, and GIR gestured towards it. Dib turned towards the door, then back to the robot. "Aren't you coming in?" GIR giggled. "I'M NOT ALLOWED IN! GOOD LUCK!!" Dib had to stop himself from grinning at how childlike the robot sounded. _It's an evil robot, it doesn't have feelings. Remember that._

The teen stepped into the lab, and instantly felt the temperature drop. His breath fogged up his glasses, and he had to take them off for a moment to wipe them on his shirt. Through his blurred vision, Dib saw a silhouette of a familiar alien. He slid his glasses back down, and walked quietly towards his nemesis. Zim hadn't noticed him yet, maybe he could scare him for a laugh. As soon as he finished that thought though, Zim spun around and jumped, his face filling with surprise and anxiety before it snapped back to it's usual salty glare.

"Hey-! What are YOU doing here!?" He spoke in a sharp and uncharacteristic voice, it almost sounded fearful in a way. The human grinned at the reaction. "Foiling your plans. Again." Instead of looking snarky or offended, Zim still looked like he was trying not to be scared. He spoke in a low voice, more serious than he had ever been. "Get out." Dib ignored this, walking over to the screen Zim had been monitoring. "What's your newest invention? A robot that makes really bad pancakes?" Dib was honestly kind of proud of himself for getting under Zim's skin, and he planned to take it as far as he could before getting a laser to the face. His alien counterpart however, did not. 

"Get out. Go away! Zim DEMANDS that you leave!" He spoke in almost a hiss, his voice cracking a little.

Dib grinned. "As if. Now I wanna know what you're hiding-"

Before he could finish speaking, the air was pushed out of his lungs as Zim shoved him. _Hard._

"No. you don't. Go find someone less superior to pester!" He shoved the human again. Dib stepped back, but stood his ground. "What the hell is wrong with you today?" Zim picked up a pair of goggles that he had dropped. "The wrong is all yours!" He yelled as he hurled them at Dib's head.

"You are NOT supposed to be here! You are NOT supposed to know yet!" He hissed again as he continued pelting the big-headed jerk before him with lab equipment. Dib shielded his head by raising his arms above him. "OW-! Know what!?" Zim snarled, he sounded more like a creature out of a horror movie than himself. "SHUT UP! GO BACK TO YOUR FILTHY HOME!" Zim grabbed a clipboard and chucked it straight at Dib's chest. He dodged somehow, and there clipboard clattered onto the ground. Dib picked it up, and his eyes went wide.

It was a blueprint. It showed a rough sketch of Dib with sloppy human anatomy on one side, and an irken with the same proportions on the other. Zim froze, realizing that he had practically _handed_ his top secret information to that slob. The taller boy's face was blank for a few seconds, before it twisted into anger. He threw the blueprints back at Zim, who dodged with a hiss. 

"You're trying to turn ME into one of you MONSTERS!?" Dib's hands curled into white-knuckled fists. Zim responded after giving him a puzzled look.

"NO, YOU IMBECILE!"

His voice lowered as he spoke again.

"You already were one."


	2. First Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uhh...still more angst
> 
> hurt/comfort but it's just hurt
> 
> warning: pretty brutal fight scene. the idiots aren't fucking around this time

"You already were one."

Dib stopped dead. "What?"

Zim didn't speak again, he just looked away, antennae facing the ground.

The human (?) shook his head. "You're messing with me." 

Zim's head rose. "I am not." He walked back over to the computer while keeping his eyes on Dib, as if the boy were a ticking time-bomb. He tapped on the keyboard, typing in a password in irken. The same image that was on the clipboard displayed on the screen. Zim turned to it, and pointed to the sketch of Dib on the right with a clawed hand. "This is your current form." His hand moved to the irken figure on the left. "This is your form when stripped of all concealing tech." The bug-like alien looked back up at Dib. "Not only are you originally irken, someone is _actively_ working to hide it from you and everyone else." 

Dib felt dizzy. "No. I'm not one of you. I _can't_ be one of you." His throat was dry as he spoke. That _freak_ was trying to get him off-guard. Zim stepped forward. Dib instinctively stepped back, his heel hitting the wall. "Get. Back." His voice was dangerously quiet. Zim took another step forward. "I'm _trying_ to help you, fool-boy." Another step, he was too close. "If I could just get some of the Gaz's DNA I could-" 

A boot hit the alien square in the chest. He gasped for air and lost his footing, landing on the ground with a crack. _That definitely wasn't good for my PAK_. Before he could sit up, the boot came down on his gut, causing a resonating pain that made him seize up in shock. _That **definitely** wasn't good for my squeedily-spooch. _He fell to the ground again, coughing. His red eyes widened as he saw a few drops of his own neon pink blood on the ground.

 **"Stay the fuck away from Gaz." **Dib's voice wasn't filled with rage, or fear. It was just cold, and flat.

Zim had never heard him like this. That didn't mean he would shy away from a fight, of course. Pushing himself into sitting, Zim swiftly extended his PAK legs and swiped at his opponent's feet. They were a bit beaten up from the fall but still fast enough to make Dib fall backwards, landing hard on his elbows. The small but swift alien lifted himself off the ground with his spider-like extensions, not wanting to be kicked again. "How DARE you!? I'm being gracious and helping you!" Zim put on his usual proud and aggressive persona, but his fear was poorly concealed. Dib forced a laugh as he rose to his feet. "Are you going to keep up this stunt forever? I'm HUMAN." He reached for one of the PAK legs, grabbing it by the joint and yanking it down. The other legs gave out, and Zim began to fall forward. Before he reached the ground though, he grabbed Dib by the shoulders, digging his claws into flesh and using him to break the fall.

Dib grunted as he hit the ground, the extra weight from the extraterrestrial pest causing him to crack his head on the floor. Dark spots appear in his vision, the claws slashing into his shoulders causing a searing pain that made it hurt to move his arms. He hissed, lifting his knee to the equivalent of Zim's stomach and throwing him to the side. Zim crushed his arm on impact with the wall, rendering it useless. Instead of getting up immediately, Zim weighed his options. He could continue throwing himself at Dib until he either knocked him out or convinced him, or he could just demonstrate.

He yelled in a hoarse voice. "Computer! Disable all concealment devices in the area!"

The house's computer brain responded almost instantly.

**"That sounds like a very bad idea."**

Zim growled. "Do NOT defy me! Do it NOW!"

**"If you say so. Disabling concealers..."**

All of the lights went out, and the room was pitch black. He heard Dib scramble to his feet in the darkness.

"Turn the lights back on, you coward! Don't you dare run away from this!" 

Zim staggered to his feet, and turned on his PAK light. As soon as he did, something slammed him to the wall, claws wrapped around his neck. "Not so high and mighty now, are you spaceboy?" A voice taunted. Zim lifted his PAK light and pointed it in the direction of the voice. 

Red eyes winced as bright pink light hit them. The owner of the voice had pale green skin, and antennae that curled back in an oddly familiar way. His glasses weren't on his face, left somewhere in the dark. Dib's face sunk back into anger. "Well?" He laughed. "Got anything to say?" 

Zim just stared. Stared at the only other irken in the entire star system, the first of his kind that he had seen in _years._ He wanted to fight, to break free, his fighting instincts were _screaming_ at him to _get out._ But he just kept watching, with wide eyes. Watching as Dib pulled back his bloodstained arm and brought his fist to Zim's face. The force hit him and it _stung,_ but he didn't speak. He was honestly pretty glad he didn't have a nose because if he did, he would probably be saying goodbye to it right about now. 

Dib seemed annoyed at the lack of reaction, and reeled back for another punch. Before the invader could even brace though, he stopped. Staring at his now green fist, Dib slowly uncurled his hand, revealing two clawed fingers and an opposable thumb. He dropped his grip on Zim's throat, causing him to slump onto the ground. The newfound alien moved his other hand up to his face, turning it over as if to confirm that he wan't seeing things. Something clicked in his brain, and his arms fell to his sides.

"You did it." Dib whispered. "You _actually_ did it." Zim froze, hardly breathing as he waited for a reaction. Dib's new antennae dropped down lifelessly, and he silently laughed, shaking slightly as blood dripped off his fingertips and onto the floor. When Dib looked up again he looked even less like himself, a lifeless smile crossing his face in the glaring magenta light.

**"I'll kill you."**


	3. Shell Shock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warning: yet more fighting, also someone gets tased
> 
> 1 am again? my sleep meds gonna have to try harder lmao

Dib had said those words before, countless times. He had even gotten surprisingly close to actually going through with it, even though Zim hated to admit it. But it never had this terrifying seriousness to it. Dib didn't even move, didn't even appear to breathe. He just stood static, as if waiting for the invader to make the first move. 

This was _bad._ Dib now had similarly matched stamina and strength, and even without it he was a fair threat. Who knows what he's capable of in this state? Before Zim could even try to guess, a crash sounded from the other room and he tensed. At the slightest movement, Dib instantly reacted. He punched at Zim's head again, but the slightly more agile irken quickly ducked, causing Dib to smash his hand against the wall. He pulled his fist back and cursed, giving Zim the chance to push him to the ground and pull out two of his PAK legs once again. He jabbed at his opponent, narrowly missing his skull when he jerked his head away. Dib looked up in fear for a moment, before settling into rage and swiftly grabbing the PAK leg stuck in the ground to pull himself upright, swiping at Zim's eyes as he did. The invader winced as Dib's newly discovered claw hit right above his eye, about where his brow would have been if he had one. A drop of blood fell into his eye, making him wince as half of his sight went blurry. Zim snarled, and used his blunt-ended PAK leg to hit Dib in the side as he staggered back. Zim watched as he got up despite being in no state to do so, wincing as he pressed his damaged hand to his side. 

_They don't teach you about this in soldier training,_ Zim thought as he pulled out two more PAK legs to push him off the ground. He hooked his two higher legs onto some wires running through the ceiling, praying that they don't snap under his weight. When they held up, he pulled his lower mechanical legs off the ground and hooked them onto wires behind him, hanging there like some seriously fucked up monkey on a vine. Dib looked up at him, eyeing him more like a spider on the ceiling than an actual threat.

"Coward," He spat. "Stop avoiding me and fight, spaceboy." Zim scoffed. "You are even more out of your mind than I suspected if you think I will fight you in this state!" Dib grinned slightly, showing brand new razor-sharp fangs. "You can't hang up there forever," He laughed. "And when you do come down, I'm gonna _dissect_ you." Oddly enough, the threat was familiar and surprisingly comforting to hear. " _THAT'S_ the best you can come up with?" It probably wasn't a good idea to aggravate the already deranged irken anymore, but Zim couldn't help it. Dib glared at him with fury, before snapping his head around as metal footsteps sounded in the doorway. 

A familiar little robot stood in the doorway, covered in odd purple goo and grinning as per usual.

"HEYA, I BROKE ONE OF YOUR SCIENCE-THINGIES. SORRY!"

Zim wanted to scream at the bot in frustration, but realized the situation and lowered his voice to a near whisper. 

"GIR, leave **right now.** " Before Zim could give any more instruction, Dib turned to the robot and began walking towards it. "Well, looks like the broken bot's here." Zim growled.

" **Don't** call GIR that."

"Or what?" Dib laughed, before turning back to the bot with a cold expression. "Get lost." He stopped right before the robot, before kicking it away with a _clunk._ GIR was surprisingly light and flew across the room, hitting the wall and falling to the floor. And that was all it took. Sure, Zim yelled at the little bot now and again, but _nobody_ gets away with hurting GIR. Before he could even register it his PAK legs began to move on their own, unhooking from the wires holding him up and letting the alien fall to the ground. A part of Zim's mind begged him to have restraint, to not escalate the already messy situation, but the majority of him was in full fighter-mode and ready to end this. He spoke a command in his mind, and one of his mechanical arms shifted into a small point crackling with electricity at the end. This ended _now._

Dib shifted his stance, looking at the irken soldier more like a threat than a spider on the wall now. Before he could throw a punch or an insult, the electrified spear jabbed at his chest, barely missing his sternum as he pivoted backwards. Dib grinned, and lunged at Zim's body mass, hardly noticing himself falling forward. Zim watched him fall without emotion, and jabbed quickly at the attacker's spine. 

Being tased is a very odd feeling. It feels hot, fiery pain spiking your nerves with lightning, but it also feels cold, like dry ice stabbing into your skin. Dib jolted, and an over-exaggerated shiver took ahold of him with force out of his control. If you could instantly give yourself chronic arthritis, Dib guessed this was how it was done (why was that his first thought in this situation?). Just then, as soon as it had started, the sensation stopped. The boy slumped to the ground, the world was darkening. This wasn't the first time he had been knocked out by Zim, but it was easily the scariest. The last thing he saw was the invader's boots, with his own blood pooling around them.

At least it didn't hurt anymore. 

Zim stepped back, trying to dodge the blood tracing the outline of his boots. The smell was salty and metallic and disgusting, hanging in the air as an agressive reminder of the damage he had inflicted. He always imagined feeling joy when this moment finally happened, when his worst enemy was left wide open for attack, but all he felt was frightening shock. Dib Membrane, the 'filthy human boy' was of the same flesh and blood as him. Speaking of which, he should probably clean the latter up before it stains.

His offending PAK leg morphed once again, this time into a sort of claw. He picked up his nemesis (?) by the collar of his ripped-up trenchcoat, shaking him a few times with his feet dangling off the ground to make sure he was out cold. As much as Zim hated it, Dib was an irken, and leaving him to die was far from honorable. A breath he didn't know he was holding escaped his chest, half a groan and half a sigh. 

"GIR?"

Almost completely unscathed (aside for a small dent it the head), the little android trotted up to Zim. 

"BOY, MARY'S SURE HAVING FUN!"

Zim grunted again, this time a full on groan.

"Go to the tech bay and wait there. I have a new problem to deal with."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ohhh my gOd i'm sorry this took so long!! i'm not even that proud of it, but i have some ideas for the next chapter so hopefully that will work out, sorry again!


End file.
